Tuesday 16 March 2010

The Unforgiven



This is my first attempt at one of Josie's Writing Workshops over at Sleep is for the Weak. For this post I have chosen the prompt "Tell me about someone from you past who you lost touch with and who you often think about. Perhaps imagine meeting them again. What would you say? What unresolved issues would you love to bury?"


There was a time when the white rage that I felt towards you was all consuming. When you first betrayed me. Before that there was a longer time when we were best friends.

We were 9 when we met, remaining friends right through school. At 18 we packed our bags and left home for the same university. When we arrived, the campus seemed so huge I thought I’d never see you again. Little did I know we would spend every day together, sharing the same house for two years.

Sharing.

We shared excitement, fun, gossip, unrequited love, broken hearts, the death of friends. We shared the success of our degrees and our coming of age. And all that time you were the golden star I longed to be.

And so we returned home. Jobs, relationships, illness, life got in the way. You married, then divorced. I had broken relationships, lost babies. But the nights out and the dancing held us together like glue.

Until the night you met him.

Of all the men in all the world, why him? You could have had anyone, but instead you decided to gatecrash my life, hijack my family, and cross a line that no friend should.

And now, when we meet at weddings and funerals, we act like strangers, masking our discomfort with politeness and pleasantries.

The white rage has gone.

All that’s left is a hole.

8 comments:

Mummy Limited said...

Wow, that is really powerful stuff and I guess a hole is better than white rage.

Jen Walshaw said...

A rage indeed. I have never experianced this is my life, but it is unforgivable indeed

san said...

Wow, what a cow. Beautifully written, Sam x

Anonymous said...

Great writing - very moving!

angelsurchinsblog said...

I was really shocked when I realised what had happened. As Sandy says, what a cow. Unbelievable.

Anonymous said...

only have *hugs* and they won't help much

alison said...

God - how could she? After all you'd been through together. Some lines are just not crossed.

Unknown said...

So late to this, apologies - just catching up.

Goodness Sam I can't believe your friend would cross a line like this. I can only begin to imagine how betrayed you felt, and how hard it must be to be reminded of that betrayal.

Thank you so much for sharing so personal, and so powerful x

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